Tired of Bullies

Doctors are supposed to be people you can go to and trust. They're not supposed to be people who you fear or are cautious of or sandbag or emotionally abuse you. I don't know if it's me or if it's the professionals out there in the healthcare field now because of the restristions or the actual field itself now, but I'm really having a hard time with this and finding someone within my insurance that I can work with. My PCP sent me to a specialist to manage my depression meds. After 4 visits over 3 months, this woman threw up her hands yesterday saying, "your case is too complicated for me, I'm only an NP (what an excuse!) I'm referring you over to the MD." Okay, while I admit that the issues I'm bringing to the table (depression, sleep deprivation from the meds and meds sensitivity to name a few) aren't a piece of cake, somehow I didn't expect this woman to throw up her hands after 4 visits and pass me off to someone else because I'm having a challenge, challenging her and expecting her to help me deal with it (isn't that her job as my meds manager?!?!?!) And to add insult to injury, I walked out of that appointment, when she was through with me, feeling as though the whole thing were my fault due to my inadequacies. While I know this isn't true, and I struggled not to accept her shortfalls onto my shoulders, it still stung when I walked out the door. Now that I reflect back, I'm glad she's referred me over to the MD. Obviously she's not the one to help me with this challenge. She just isn't up to it, nor does she appear to want to rise to it, either. Just as well she's passing me off. I'd rather be working with someone who WANTS to try to help me. Maybe this next one will be the one. I hope so. Fingers crossed...