Thankfulness

As many of you know, I never seem to do anything in the straight-forward, normal, true-to-fashion manner. I seem to be off marching to my own drummer, making my own pattern, writing my own story. So I guess this should apply to my thankfulness this Thanksgiving as well. As I sit here at the end of this long holiday weekend reviewing the state of my life, I'm saddened, scared, frustrated, and confused as to how I got to where I am. Saddened that I've lost my family to the tides of time. Scared that I am alone in the vast world with no family left to fall back on. Frustrated because it feels like I've made such a mess of my life. And confused because I really can't tell you where everything that happened started. Sometimes it's difficult to remember that it will get better and that I have to have patience. And there will be a lot of changes in the meantime. And there have been a lot of changes already. I have a place to live, yes, but I've lost my house and I'm unemployed. But in the midst of my life feeling like it's falling apart, it feels so hard to find something to be thankful for. I could use lines like, "I have my health." Don't get me wrong, I'm very thankful for my health. But through it all there have been friends who have reached out a hand, sent a text, an email, an instant message, or phoned me to see how I am and keep in touch. To let me know I'm not alone, that they're there for me, that they care. To all of you (you know who you are), I'm thankful for you!